The old one was different. The old one made things possible- allowed me to play before I was supposed to, before I was ready. The old one represented how hard I had worked and how far I had come. Don't get me wrong, I hated it. I hated the daily reminder of what I had loss. But in the end, that brace marked a stage in a long battle, the final stage. That brace came off... and this one won't.
I ran with it on today, the first time I'd put it on. Its bigger than I realized. It limits not just my side motion but also my ability to bend. It felt tight and it scratches my other knee- its just not comfortable. It's stupid and I'll get used to it, but I really don't want to. I don't want to get used to wearing it, to bringing it with me, to needing it.
What does this one represent other than pain and weakness?